There is nothing beautiful about anger. Whether it’s a person raging like hell’s fury or throwing a slight tantrum, anger is not pretty. No one wants to be near a person who is having an uncontrollable burst of anger. The energy of anger is thick and aggressive. It lingers in the air and weighs down on everyone the room. Anger creates an energy that’s palpable.
Of course, anger is an emotion we will not escape if we are human. We are emotional beings, but it is our job to learn how to control the anger. If we do not control anger, it controls us. Rage is a monster. It leaves no room for reason. Too much anger is not healthy for the mind, mood, or body. Rage can increase your blood pressure and take away your focus. It can ruin your concentration. With angry clenched jaws and fists, and vessels ready to burst, you are not thinking straight. You are experiencing what Buddhists call afflictive emotion: A form of suffering.
Buddhists strive to end suffering. Buddha is careful to note that anger is an emotion that has its place. Anger is a necessary emotion. It is a feeling we should call on whenever we need to protect ourselves. It is something we call on when we need to fight off danger. Anger is acceptable when fighting any form of injustice. But, in each case, we must control the anger and not allow it to control us.
When anger is not necessary, we need to strive for calm and rationality. Per Buddha, the highest state of rationale is when we are calm and collected. It is when we act out of love that Buddha suggests we are at our best. Buddha says it is then that we are “more insightful, more effective, more vital, and more enduring.” The goal then is to allow anger to exist only under the right and necessary conditions. Here is how the Buddhists recommend how to do so.
STEP 1: Reflect On The Effects Of Anger.
Someone wise once said that when you are angry at another, it is like drinking poison. You drink your own poison and then wait for the one who angers you to die. The anger you hold carry poisons you from the inside out. It changes how you look and how you feel. It gives away your personal power. It allows a person to manipulate you without saying a word. Why? Because you are doing it to yourself. All aspects of your life can suffer when you do not have anger under control. Sleep, health, love, the home life, and your career will see the negative effects. In a social setting, when you are an angry person, you will see no one wants to be around your negative energy.
STEP 2: Consider The Good Things About A Person Who Has Invoked Your Anger.
Anger can make us blind. It forces us to look at all negative attributes we can find about a person. We do this to justify our feelings. We begin to see the person as entirely bad, willfully evil, ignorant, and malevolent. We ignore their goodness because of our personal biases. But, we can begin to change our perception. When we look at our foe as someone who has goodness in them, we can begin to soften the hardness of our anger.
STEP 3: Recall A Time When The Person Who Angered You Did Something Wonderful.
At one time, the person you are angry at was a friend. If that is the case, you’ve had some wonderful moments together. Look to those moments now to soften the hardness of your fury. It’s difficult to demonize a person who can show us a kindness or two.
STEP 4: Close Your Eyes, And Use Your Natural Ability To Visualize Full Control Of Your Anger.
Visualizations involving the natural world will help you let go of anger. If you see yourself as Mother Earth know that she is home to every human being. She doesn’t shake people off. Even when they abuse her, she still comes back renewed. Nature is not judgmental. It doesn’t rate things as good or bad. Here you can see yourself as the steadfast Earth. See yourself as strong, patient, and nourishing, no matter how much abuse the Earth endures. Or you can act like a running body of clear water in motion in your visualization. Let it carry negativity away without tainting the color of the clear waters.
STEP 5: Clear You Mind In Meditation Sessions.
Entering the stillness can help you calm and center. Some Buddhists start and conclude each session of meditation with the same technique. The practice is the “The Cultivation of Loving Kindness.” or the “metta bhavana.” The goal of the meditation is to stir up feelings of love and goodwill. The meditation requires that you concentrate on a series of intentions: “May I be well. May I be at ease. May I be happy.” You repeat this while wishing the same for others or even the world. Then you meditate and see yourself happy, joyful, and experiencing bliss.
These simple exercises ensure you’ll have no problem eradicating anger. The less anger you have in your life, the better it is for your mind, body, and soul. By minimizing anger, you also put a limit to the negativity that goes out into the world. Remember, all you do and feel has a ripple effect in the physical world. Separateness is an illusion. We a connected, so the anger you carry within you or react to will have an impact on everyone and everything.